Naturally Knocked Up

My visit with my new Reproductive Endocrinologist aka RE aka Fertility Specialist left me wanting. I wanted to learn more about how I could make myself ovulate normally. I want to know if there is anything I could do (food, exercise, meditation, yoga, etc.) that could somehow normalize my hormones and prepare my body for conception.

I searched for natural ways over the Internet and found this wonderful website "Naturally Knocked Up". I am new to the site but I am ovewhelmed with information about getting pregnant using natural methods. It makes me empowered with the fact that I could and would get pregnant without relying to Western medicines. The truth is, having a fertility workup is no fun.

I also came over another parenting site (which I think is a sister site of Naturally Knocked Up though I'm not sure), Natural Parents Network. An article entitled "Overcoming {in}fertility, the Natural Way" caught my eye. If you are like me who is struggling with in- or sub-fertility, read the article for inspiration.

Healthy Options

I've decided to have a healthy lifestyle to help me conceive next year. Since I was diagnosed to have anovulatory cycle (meaning, I don't ovulate regularly) due to PCOS, I will do whatever I can to alter my body's physiology to make it conducive to pregnancy.

Articles about PCOS recommends the patient to have a high protein-low carbs diet. White rice, pastas, white bread and potatoes are a no-no. Also, a big NO to refined sugars, pancakes, jams and syrups. All the things I love! Now, it's YES to brown rice, multi-grain muesli, organic and dark leafy veggies and unprocessed foods.

To jumpstart my healthy living goal, I checked out Healthy Options for some healthy food options. I bought Bob's Red Mill Old Country Style Muesli. A bag costs P249.

You can take the muesli hot by boiling ¼ cup muesli with ½ cup water or milk. If you want it cold, pour 1 cup milk to ½ cup muesli. Let the muesli soak the milky goodness before eating.

The bag is transparent so you can see what the muesli contains. It has raisins, almonds, walnuts, sunflower seeds and oats.

Healthy Options
2/F SM Megamall Bldg. B

Off to Salcedo Market

Salcedo Saturday Market is a once a week event wherein different purveyors of fresh ingredients and cooked foods come together. Located in a parking lot, vendors from nearby residents and towns put up their stalls to display and sell their wares. Locals and foreigners alike come to this market to enjoy freshly cooked meals, organic produce and other merchandise.

My sister and I went to Salcedo Market to see for ourselves what's the buzz about this market. The market is open from 7am-2pm. Buyers are advised to come early in the morning. We came around 8am and already saw a lady with plastic bags full of fresh vegetables from Salcedo,

We window shopped first to see what's in store for us. We saw stalls offering different local cuisines from Pampanga and other Filipino dishes, to foreign ones such as Chinese, French, Australian, Spanish and Thai. There are products from Batangas, sausages from Vigan and Lucban and wood products for the kitchen.

I saw bottles of chili garlic sauce for P150 each and I bought two. The label says it is made from chilis, garlic and olive oil. When we tried it at home, we liked it very much and it reminds us of the hot condiment used when serving siomai. And we love siomai!

I also bought organic rice (P85/half kilo) and muscovado sugar (P50/half kilo). The seller said, “Masarap siguro kayo magluto.” as he smiled and gave my change.

My sister bought wooden salt and pepper shakers for P125. Since it's wood, you can't see what condiment is inside but, the clever wood carver shaped the holes on top as “S” for salt and “P” for pepper. Nice.

A stall wherein there's a lot of customers is the Z stall which offers freshly cooked Hungarian sausages. We ordered one in Ciabatta. It's big enough for the two of us. In Salcedo Market, there is an area where tables and chairs are set for eaters but it was full so we just looked for a bench under a tree to eat the sandwich.

Before we left, we bought organic vegetables, to complete our Salcedo Market trip.

Being in the Salcedo market makes you forget that you are inside a very busy, commercialized place. The market is surrounded by tall buildings and condo units but there are lots of trees and plants, children's playground and semi-secluded benches where you can take your shoes off and unwind.

Salcedo Saturday Market
Saturdays
7am – 2 pm
Barangay Bel-Air, Makati City

New Infertility Specialist

I have a hard time dealing with the term “infertility specialist". It somehow connotes that I'm sterile, which I'm not. Trying to conceive puts a lot of pressure to husbands and wives and saying you are consulting with an “infertility specialist” puts unnecessary pressure. I should look for another diplomatic, more humane term for “infertility specialist”.

I went to Friendly Care to consult with my second infertility specialist, Dra. Angela Aguilar. After reading women forums and searching the Internet for a specialist near where I work, I found Dra. Aguilar.

At Friendly Care, you can get your queue number before the doctor's clinic hours start. The nurses will get primary information of the patient. You can stay and wait in the clinic's waiting area or you can come back at a later time, when the doctor is in.

I was a bit nervous of my consultation. Here, I am meeting the person who might help me get pregnant next year. This is the doctor whom I will expose my self to.

At first, she thought I was her patient before but I corrected her. She got her netbook and got my information on her prepared patient's data template.

She discussed with me the four phases of assisted reproduction technology. After each phase, the patient has to rest. It seems I'm through with Phase 1 which is ovulation through drugs and timed intercourse and is now on Phase 2. She suggested I get hysterosalpingogram (HSG) before Hubby arrives.

HSG is a test which I dread. My previous OB told me about HSG in passing, saying she doesn't recommend it yet at that time. HSG is a test of the fallopian tubes. A catheter-like device will be inserted in the woman's vagina. A colored dye will be released through the device as an X-ray machine will take shots of the dye's journey inside. If the dye spills through the tubes, it means you have patent tubes or clear tubes. The egg and sperm can have a date. If the dye doesn't come out, it means that one or both your tubes are blocked, which means no dating place.

I'm scared of HSG. Maybe because I've read that there are women who faint or scream because of the pain. I deduce these women are those with blocked tubes. If the dye is not spilling out, then the pressure of the dye coming in continues, making it uncomfortable and painful.

Since Hubby is not with me and HSG may be done in July, Dra. prescribed that I get vaccinated with MMR (mumps, measles and rubella) and HPV (human papillomavirus). I'm really getting good with these acronyms. MMR costs P700 in Friendly Care and HPV is P2,000 per dose, I need 3 doses. These vaccines should be administered 3 to 6 months before pregnancy. I told Dra. Aguilar that I will start vaccination on January. This will give me time to save money and the courage to undergo body piercing which I'm not a fan of.

Friendly Care

Now that Hubby's not with me (physically), we decided that I should consult an OB-GYNE again to ask what I could do in these 9 months so I could prepare my body for conception.


I've searched the Internet for ways to increase my fertility without taking any invasive drugs. I've read Dr. William's book The Fastest Way to Get Pregnant Naturally. I'll post a review later. I've read forums about PCOS, finding fertility doctors near me and alternative treatments such as acupuncture, reflexology, Chinese medicine, etc.


Now, I'm in my first step. I've found a new fertility doctor, Dr. Angela Aguilar. According to The Filipino Doctor website, she is affiliated with St. Luke's - Global (expensive and popular hospital for the rich and famous), Cardinal Santos Medical Center and Friendly Care. I decided to go to Friendly Care since it's the nearest hospital where I live.


I called the day before I went to Friendly Care to check whether Dra. Aguilar will be present for consultation. I wouldn't want to waste my time and money going there and then learn that she is on leave or something. The nurse said she is available and advised me to come at least an hour before Dra. Aguilar's schedule which is from 12nn-2pm.


The night before, I prepared the things I will bring. I foresee lots of waiting. I have my lab results and prescriptions from my previous OB, a book and laptop. I also brought my water bottle and some snacks. Yes, when I'm nervous, I overpack, it seems.


At 10am, I arrived at Friendly Care. You can't miss the sign of red with bright yellow background. Each doctor has a queue number which is color-coded. I got the white one which is Dra. Aguilar's. The nurse also gave me an info sheet which I filled out.


At the Nurses' Station, there is a PA system where they call out the number. You'll hear "Number 26 Blue color..." After a few minutes of waiting, I heard "Number 9 OB-Endo". Not sure if it was me who is being called, thinking that the nurse would instead say "Number 9 white color". The nurse called a few times, the woman next to me in the waiting area said that it is indeed me who is being called. Bloopers!


I immediately went to the Nurses' Station. The nurse was attending to Number 10. I apologized saying it was my first time and I didn't know that it was my number which was being called. The nurse took Number 10's weight and blood pressure (BP). Then, I was next.


Since a first timer, the nurse, Karel, informed me of their different health cards. They have a health card for P980 which includes free doctor's fee (any doctor), 10% discount on lab tests including ultrasound and another discount which I forgot. This card is valid for a year. I got a form and said I would think about it. This card is what I need. Fertility workups cost alot and this card will save us some money on consultation fees. I don't think I need it now so I said that I'll just apply next year, when Hubby is here.


Nurse Karel is very accomodating and kind. I asked her about Dra.'s fee (she said P350) and ultrasound fee (P500). Way cheaper from my previous hospital fees! Woohooo!


After getting my weight and BP, Nurse Karel asked if I would be waiting for Dra. Aguilar or I would just return for my turn. She said I could return around 12:30pm. Yes! I could stroll at the mall and relax.


I have a good feeling about Friendly Care. Hopefully my consultation with Dra. Aguilar will be fruitful. I hope I can ask all the questions I've written down.

What's Missed?

It's been days since my last post.

Here's what's this blog missed:

• Hubby started his overseas contract last November 4. I went with him to the airport twice. The first one, he and two other crew members did not have a transit visa in one country so their flight was postponed. The following day, they were able to acquire the transit visa and then they were off.
• I was not able to get pregnant. :(

Healing Mass

Hubby and I went to a Healing Mass at the Padre Pio Shrine last October 23. A Healing Mass is held every 23rd of the month, 9am and 6pm. Why attend only know even if the shrine is around our community? Blame it on forgetfulness or selective amnesia. We were planning on attending mass at the Padre Pio Church but always had a reason or another to postpone it. Last Saturday was D DAY.

After a therapeutic massage (which hurt and didn't make us relaxed), we hurriedly went to the Padre Pio Church. We were late for the 6pm mass and I was praying that the jeep we're riding will not make any long and unnecessary stops.

As we arrived to the church, there were no parishoners. The doors were closed and only a blue light shone through the window. We're not that late and we were wondering where the people are. We checked the schedule and there really is a Healing mass that night.

An SUV parked in front of the church and a lady went to the side of the church, maybe there is an entrance there. A man told us that the mass is held at the Padre Pio Shrine, a few meters from the church. So we went there. The lady named Consuelo gave us a ride. She said she is scheduled for breast surgery in a few days.

As we reached the Shrine, there were many vehicles parked outside and many people are attending mass. We sat at the back and listened to the homily.

The priest said if your prayers are not yet answered, don't stop praying. Continue to pray to Padre Pio. I'm guilty of that. I stopped praying the novenas when I got my period, thinking it is useless to still pray when there are no days left for Hubby and I to do the baby-dance (how am I so mistaken by that!). I was itching to take pictures but thought it to be disrespectful.

After the mass is the Healing Ritual. Another priest led us to the ritual. As he urged us to sing "Come Holy Spirit", tears were rolling down my eyes. I'm bit ashamed of this emotional outburst but thought that if it is natural for me to cry, then go ahead.

After the singing and humming of "Come Holy Spirit", prayers in the Padre Pio novena (the prayer for healing and intercession of Padre Pio) were said aloud. After the prayers, we were asked to form two lines in the central aisle as we prepare to kiss Padre Pio's relic. Since we were seated at the back, we were the last to kiss the relic. Not to worry about germs in the relic, a Lay Minister swipes the relic with a scented cloth after each kisser.

Those who were finished kissing/praying to the relic will form another line around the alter. The priest will anoint them on the forehead, left palm and right palm, clasp the palms in prayer position and say AMEN.

After the anointing of oil, Hubby and I prayed to the statue of Padre Pio, Jesus and Mama Mary. The whole experience was very solemn and very peaceful.

As Ate Consuelo said her prayers, she bid us goodbye. I hugged her and told her we'll be praying for her. She gave me a somewhat smile and sigh for that. We only knew each other at that moment, she didn't even got our names, but it seems she's our close friend, a relative. I hope someday we'll meet again.

Postponed

So, Hubby's departure for his new contract overseas has been postponed again. He's supposed to leave last weekend. We decided not to visit our OB this month since we thought the workup would be left hanging when he leaves.

I can say that I'm more relaxed now than the previous months. No meds to worry about, no more transvaginal sonograms (TVS), no more "contact sched", no more tests. [insert sigh] I just let it be. If God blesses us a baby this month even without treatments, we are very grateful. If not, we are still very grateful since this ordeal strengthens my relationship with Hubby.

Cookies from Pantoja

I have a new favorite cookie-- Oatmeal Raisin Cookies from Panaderia de Pantoja. A pack of 6 cookies costs P28.

It's crunchy outside and moist inside with lots of raisins. Love it!

Floral and Garden Show

My mother, Hubby and I went to Los Baños, Laguna for the annual "Floral and Garden Show". Mother is an orchid lover and only during this event can she buy orchids at a much lesser cost. It was slightly raining that day but it didn't dampen our spirits of going to UPLB.

This event has a floral arrangement competition and we first walked around to see the winners. The flowers are breath taking! Mother is filled with envy. :)

Nursery owners are divided in two areas -- trees (not sure if this is the correct term) and commercial. We went to the area where tree seedlings are sold. I saw cactus, air plants that costs much, different seedlings and I saw a plant with an unusual leaf shape. the plant's leaves are shaped like butterflies you will think you are seeing butterfly infestation in the plant. Bummer I wasn't able to take its picture. I wasn't able to see its name too.

After touring the area, we bought 2 calamansi seendlings which already bear fruit, a Maharlika rambutan, and a dwarf pomelo.

Next, we visited the Commercial part of the garden show. Stalls are lined in three columns. Mother immediately saw orchids and was already talking to the owner before I was able to take pictures.

Saw small pitcher plants for sale at P50.

I saw these potted herbs. I've been wanting to cultivate herbs for our future herb garden. Hubby was not that optimistic, saying it's too early to buy these herbs. But I persuaded him and he gave in! We have sage, Java mint and rosemary all for P100! I will research on how to take care of these babies so Hubby will be proud.

This type of orchid costs P90 each. Mother, being an orchid fanatic, bought all the orchids she could buy with her pocket money.

At the end of the trip, Mother said "I'm so happy!" and that's all that matters.

Next Year

I have sad news. This cycle of fertility workup was not a success.

A few days before my scheduled pregnancy test, I had some mild cramps. That symptom alerted me that this month is not our month of conceving a baby. I have some doubts about it because deep inside, I want us to have a baby. He's leaving for overseas work in a few days and we wanted a baby when he returns.

Everyday I prayed and said a novena to Padre Pio, St. Gerard Majella and Pope John Paul II for me to conceive. But, this is not our time yet.

With a heavy heart, I accept this but not removing hopefullness in the future. What this past few months taught me is we may do all we can to conceive but only God decides in the end. He has a much greater plan for Hubby and I.

Books by Color

image from colourlovers

As I was watching a show on cable about green homes (forgot the title), I saw a house wherein they arranged their books by colors of the rainbow. The owner said it is more interesting that way. And I thought that's a great idea!

I have books at home that are kept in different cabinets and tables. They're not organized. They're just there. Wherever a book fits. I know I should be penalized for doing these to my precious books but I have no proper book shelf at home.

So, when Hubby and I build our house, we will most definitely have lots of bookshelves. And I would do the "color blocking". Instead of filing my books by title or genre, I will use the color of their spines to organize. I'll try to do this over the weekend, just to try it.

Sounds like fun!

Magical Beginnings

I am not yet pregnant and here I already have a collection of books about pregnancy and breastfeeding. I told myself I should read these books and get informed prior to getting pregnant. But another part of me is saying that I should put off reading since I may get depressed reading something that is not yet happening to me.

I decided to first read Deepak Chopra's "Magical Beginnings, Enchanted Lives" (I admit, I first heard about Deepak Chopra in Mike Myers' film "Love Guru") which I bought on a secondhand shop. It discusses different ways to experience your pregnancy in a holistic way. Since I'm on a fertility workup which entails me to take lots of drugs, I thought I should be as holistic as possible if and when I get pregnant.

It's an inspiring book that gives you a new way to see and deal with pregnancy.

My Favorite Place -- Booksale

It's the end of the month. It's payday. It's the time for me to go to a second-hand book shop called Booksale. I told myself a month ago that I should limit my book buying to once a month to control my budget and to have proper organization of my books. I usually go over budget when I'm in a secondhand book shop. In book stores where prices are astounding, I rarely go overboard, maybe buying one or two, at the most, books. But in a secondhand bookshops, I can go gaga!

I was excited as I left the office and walked my way to the nearest mall. No rain can prevent me from going to Booksale. I tried to give myself a maximum budget to splurge in my book hoarding, I mean, hunting, but failed. I reasoned that I only go once a month, might as well buy all the books that I want. Yes, it's bad for my wallet and I have to re-train myself to mind my purchases.

My feet felt giddy. If I could run to the mall, I would but that won't look so nice. I even hummed as I walk the mall's pavement. Imagine me, humming! Just because of a trip to the book shop. I must be losing it.

There were a few customers at Booksale, mostly guys. Maybe the ladies will be here a little later.

I went to the Bestseller section and immediately saw a familiar book cover. It's a Sidney Sheldon novel entitled "Nothing Lasts Forever"! (swoon) I haven't read this before in my history of Sheldon reading. I picked it up, checked the price, it's P130. Good!

I browsed the other shelves and did not find anything that I might like to read. I thought that I should look more intently to the titles so I can pick up another book. Then, I saw "Mosaic" by Soheir Khashoggi. I saw this book in a bookstore and thought of adding it to my Book Wish List. Now, I have to delete it from the list. Mosaic is priced at P80.

Founding "Mosaic" seemed to open my eyes in finding other interesting books. I saw "Tara Road" by Maeve Binchy which costs P80. I thought I should look for other Tara Road books since at Booksale, they have different pricing for the same book, depending on its newness and the quality of the paper (sometimes there are books with warped pages, this costs less).

Behind me, two girlfriends are talking about the books they have. One said she has "The Secret Garden" by Frances Hodgson Burnett for P35. Thirty-five pesos?!

The game of Finders Keepers is on! When they left, I quickly looked at the table/shelf where I assumed they got the 35-peso book. I want to have a cheap book also. :) I thought I have honed my bargain hunting of books but I was wrong.

There, at the bottom shelf, was another copy of Tara Road...for P45. I also saw "The Pilot's Wife" by Aniita Shreve for P45, which I bought for P80 last month. Bummer. See how patiently looking for books would give you much savings?

My buy of the day would be "A Wrinkle in Time" by Madeleine L'Engle for P60. I've been meaning to buy this book years ago but haven't got the chance. Now I have it.

At the end of my book hunting, I was able to purchase 5 books for P345. Five books at the cost of one fiction novel in bookstores! Weeee!

September Goals - Revisited

As the start of a new month, I revisited my goals for September to see what I've accomplished. Here were my goals last month:

1. clean my closet and remove clothes which I haven't used and will not use in the future --> done!

2. recycle the jars/bottles and use them as container for salt, garlic powder, paprika and other seasonings --> totally forgot about this. :(

3. plant the seedlings which we purchased over the weekend to our lot --> no time to do this

4. update the layout of the collection of German and Russian recipes I searched on the Internet. This is for the Hubby, by the way. --> done!

5. try to cross-stitch at least 2 hours on weekends. My cross-stitch project has been left undone for several months now. --> half-done. I wasn't able to cross-stitch every weekend.

Well, well, I scored 2.5. Not good enough for me. I'll try to work more for reaching my goals.

The Pilot's Wife

image from here

The Pilot's Wife is the first Anita Shreve novel that I've finished reading. I bought it in Booksale for P80. (I love Booksale!).

The novel is about a widow who comes to terms about the sudden death of his husband and the double life he had lead when he was alive. Memories of Kathry Lyons' with her deceased husband alternates chapters telling her story in the present. Nice style of writing, if I may say so. As the chapter about the present ends, I automatically shift my mindset to read a chapter about Kathryn's life in the past.

At first, I felt that the novel was dragging, with its highly descriptive narration. I'm used to reading Sidney Sheldon's novels where it is fast paced, spanning different locations and time. But, this lengthy narration is a plus for the novel since it makes you visualize where and how the story happens. It seems that you are watching Kathryn as she laugh, cry in sorrow and become angry with things which are out of her control.

As the novel nears its end, I found myself reading and flipping the pages quickly. I wanted more spare time so I can read till the end. I want to know what happens to Kathryn and her child. I asked myself what I would do if I were in Kathryn's shoes. And I'm not disappointed as I read the last paragraphs of the novel.The ending is perfect for all the turmoil Kathryn experienced after her husband's death. It maintained Kathryn Lyons as a lady.

Pregnyl Shot

I had my Pregnyl shot on CD 19. Dra. Tanangonan informed me to go to the clinic for an ultrasound. This, after five days of ovulation testing that resulted negative.

She said I may have a problem with the hormone being detected by the ovulation tests that's why none of the tests produced two dark lines.

We forego of the ultrasound to check on the size of my three follicles and instead did a Pregnyl shot. A shot costs P2,000. I'm not sure of the dosage though. It was an intramuscular injection, meaning, it is injected within a muscle, not an a vein, but a muscle.

Dra. asked me to put my elbows on the clinic bed. She lifted a part of my blouse at the back, grabbed the muscle along my waistline, said "Ready" and injected this potent drug. It was a bit painful (I'm not a piercing fanatic) but I have to endure it. Whatever it takes to have a baby, I will do.

While she is injecting Pregnyl, I kept saying to myself to relax and this too will be over soon. Relax. Relax. Relax.

I do hope that this cycle of workup is successful.

Our "Stash"

Having a fertility workup includes purchasing lots of drugs and testing kits. I've had drugs to make me ovulate (Clomid), to make my uterine lining thicker (Progynova) so a future embryo have a nice "cushion" to implant itself and now I have something to prevent miscarriage or "pampakapit" (Duphaston).

Sometimes I wonder if these drugs will have a negative effect on my body and my future baby. But in times of urgency, I would have to believe in what my OB prescribes. Besides, this is the last cycle of workup for this year. If this cycle remains unfruitful, Hubby and I will try again next year.

Iskrambol

When I was in elementary, street food vendors flock the gates of my school. They wait from lunch time until the afternoon when students rush home after eight hours (or more) of learning. Of course, students would always buy their fish balls, unripe mangoes with bagoong, cotton candy, fried peanuts, ice scramble (called "iskrambol") etc before going home. I like ice scramble for it is a combination of cool and sweet. But, I rarely eat street food, fearing I'll get hepatitis or some unclean food-borne disease.

Good thing, ice scramble is making a come back. In a morning show, an owner of an ice scramble business said their advantage to ice scrambles sold in the streets is that their product is clean. I've seen people patiently waiting in line to buy ice scramble and I joined the pack and tried some.

A small cup costs P7-10 depending on the "brand" you are buying from. Additional P3-4 if you want to add toppings like cereals, candy sprinkles (my fave), choco sprinkles, rice crispies, etc. When I smelled the milk and choco syrup on top of this cold treat, I was brought back to my younger years in school. Funny how a scent brings back memories.

Where's our Lot?

That is how our lot looked like before.

After four months of not visiting the site, Hubby decided to take a look and see where we would plant our seedlings. He missed the site because of the shrubs and grasses. He looked for the cement wall to know that it is indeed our lot.

We hired 3 of our neighbors to cut the grass and clean the site. It took them 1 1/2 days to make the site presentable.

Note to self: visit and clean the site frequently to avoid the massive growth of unwanted plants.

Enhance Your Fertility

I saw the article "8 Natural Ways to Enhance Your Fertility" on Yahoo!. Quite timely isn't it?

Pregnyl

On Cycle Day 14, I went to Dra. Tanangonan for a check-up. Today is Follicle Monitoring day. The wait was so loooong. It took sometime before the secretary gave me request slip for a TVS (transvaginal sonogram) and I waited more than an hour in the Ultrasound lobby for my turn. I was worried that Dra. might have forgotten me and leave the hospital soon.

I was with pregnant mommies also scheduled for an ultrasound. There is one who looked like she's carrying the baby lower than the normal position. I heard she is going to have an abortion since the position is perilous both to the mom and baby. Sad.

All the other patients in the waiting area are finished with their ultrasounds. Another set of patients came and I'm still there! Luckily, Dra. finally came and did the TVS.

On my right ovary I have 2 follicles measuring 1.1 and 1.3cm while on my left ovary I have a 2.2cm follicle. Last cycle, I only had two follicles in my right ovary.

We went back to the clinic and the secretary thought that I already left the hospital. Waaah! Maybe she kept calling me while I was in the Ultrasound room waiting for my turn.

Dra. recommended I do ovulation tests for three days. When the test becomes positive, I should contact her. She will inject Pregnyl. It is a drug that would stimulate mature follicles to "rupture" and release the egg. And the cost is outstanding...P2,000 for a shot!

I thought if P2,000 is the only thing that keeps me from getting pregnant, I might as well pay for it though expensive. Yes, many would say that this is so exaggerated. But, if your husband is going away for months and you desperately wanted to have a child, wouldn't you do the same? I just console myself that the money can be gained again but the chance of hubby and I getting pregnant are going slim every single day. Might as well do what it takes to help me get pregnant.

Sometimes, I think that life is unfair. But then again, maybe it isn't.

There are those who have unwanted pregnancies, abort their babies, leave their babies in churches or garbage dumps! And there are those who desperately want to have a child but are having difficulties.

I am just thankful that we have the resources to finance our workup. I know a couple who got married three weeks ahead of us who are still trying to conceive. They don't have money to pay for a workup.

Christmas Gifts

Christmas is still 3 months away but I'm thinking of what to give to my family and friends. I may try buy at the mall (or Divisoria) but another voice says I should try to be creative. I'm thinking of having a DIY gifts which I could turn into a business in the future.

Right now, I'm looking at making soaps. I love scented soaps, aromatherapeutic soaps, multicolored soaps, etc. We all use soaps so that's a practical thing to give.

I still have to find a recipe for an organic and eco-friendly soap. Most of the sites I viewed uses lye, a strong chemical you need gloves (and maybe a face mask) to protect yourself. Waaah! Scary!

Thanks, Cheps!

Being unable to succeed in trying to conceive a baby, my friend Cheps is one of my emotional support. She now lives Down Under but I keep updating her on my conception progress. It took her a year after marriage before conceiving. She always remind me that she and her husband are together for that whole year unlike Hubby and I who only have a few months of togetherness. I need not fret too much she says.

Thanks Cheps for being here (figuratively, that is) for me. It means a lot to me that you keep on giving me nice thoughts. It comforts me that I know that you understand where I'm standing right now. You're so right in saying I do not need to hear other people's criticisms masked as opinions. Other people, in their good intent of advising, sometimes come off as being judgemental and I don't need that, do I?

Thanks again for being my friend. See you soon!

Fertility Yoga

Is there such a thing? After a few clicks in Google, the answer is YES. Searching for natural ways to help me conceive, I came across the Yoga4Fertility website. The name says it all!

The website contains asanas for beginners, home and Bikram and meditation for fertility. I'm so excited to have encountered such a site!

I saw this website a few weeks ago. Since Hubby and I were not successful in our first cycle of workup, I decided to finally give the asanas and meditation for fertility a try. As much as possible, I want to do holistic ways to aid my highly-medicated workup. I feel that my medications to make me ovulate affects my hormones and I fear that in the future, I might be having problems caused by these meds. So, to counterbalance (sort of), I'll try to follow the yoga poses and meditation from Yoga4Fertility.

Wish me luck! Hope I can pull this off.

TTC Cycle 1 - Failed

I'm so disheartened. We really, really thought that our workup with Dra. Tananggonan is successful. I'm supposed to have my period on CD (cycle day) 32. That day came and went without the red visitor. CD 33 came, no period. CD 34 came, no period, until night came. There was very minimal spotting. Hubby and I hoped that it was just that. But, before I went to bed, my period made sure that it was ever present and not just some spotting.

Hubby reminds me to take it easy and not to stress thinking about it. I want to think of something else besides baby-making. But it keeps on popping on my mind! Huhuhu.

Why is it that the things which your heart desires are the things which are hard to get?

Preggy Sites

In my search for holistic pregnancy and child rearing, I came across The Green Doula site. A doula, according to Dictionary.com, is a "woman who assists women during labor and after childbirth".

The site writes about everything eco-friendly, holistic and "green" about pregnancy and life. There are products, ideas and suggestions that can help an expectant mom. The writer is based in the US so there are some articles which are locally-centered.

Another site which I visit is the Offbeat Mama with the tag line, "Parenting against the grain." Nice huh? The author of the blog, Ariel, is also the author of Offbeat Bride. She went from bride-to-be to a mom. The site features write-ups of other "offbeat mamas" which celebrates the miracle of pregnancy and childbirth. I'm not a tattoed-wife but it didn't sway me from reading these articles. Motherhood is a gift and women should embrace it in whichever way is comfortable to us.

Eventhough Hubby and I haven't yet confirmed if I'm pregnant, I still can't help myself in browsing sites and blogs about pregnancy and buying books about it. Yesterday, I bought a book about holistic pregnancy and one about nursing. I know that I will be pregnant and will have children in the future, might as well buy these books so I can learn about things beforehand. Also, these books are on sale. I'll have them in another post.

It's nice to think about the possibility of actually carrying another life within you. I hope we are successful this time.

Rambutans

It's Rambutan season! The rich red and "hairy" fruits are a nice contrast on the tree's green leaves. It seems it is telling you to pick them up already!

Rambutan (Nephelium lappaceum) is considered as an exotic fruit in Southeast Asia. But this fruit is so ordinary in our community that almost every backyard has a rambutan tree. Most of the trees are planted in the front yard, where it can get lots of sun. Inay says she thinks rambutan trees wanted all the sun it can get. She noticed rambutan tree started "flowering" when the trees in our neighborhood are already bearing fruits. Our tree doesn't get much sunlight because there is a big santol tree blocking the rays.

August-September is the time to gather the rambutans. I love rambutan but not as much as Hubby. I think he can finish a kilo all by himself, although he's modest and didn't do it at home.
We were able to give bags and bags of these fruits to neighbors, friends and my in-laws.

After gobbling up the fleshy fruit and sipping its liquid, we are now out of supply. Till next year!

Plant Seedlings

Hubby and I visualized our home to be relaxing and shady. A place where we could unwind, prop our feet on a chair while drinking a cool glass of juice.

Over the weekend, we went to a nearby nursery to buy plant seedlings. We have been planning to buy fruit and shade trees that will surround our future home. There are rows and rows of different plants in black plastic "pot". A green thumb's paradise indeed.

We bought 3 seedlings of rambutan (Nephelium lappaceum) at P40 each, 2 calamansi (Citrus ×microcarpa) and 1 chico (Sapodilla) for P50 each. We chose rambutan because it's one of our favorite fruits and the calamansi is a basic cooking ingredient and condiment. We bought the chico seedling because this bears fruit that is brown, not the usual guava-apple types of fruits. I want our future children to be familiar with all sorts of plants and fruits.

We also saw a pomelo tree (Citrus maxima) already bearing fruits. The tree is a bit taller than us with low branches. You can easily grab a fruit for your salad or you can eat it as is. Hubby likes pomelo and wants to have this tree in our backyard. Sadly, the nursery has sold out all their pomelo seedlings. Many are now planting pomelos. We'll be returning to check if these seedlings are available.

The seedlings we bought are now in Inay's garden waiting to be planted. I'm excited to bring them to our lot and plant them.

Tip: Bring a big bag or plastic when buying seedlings and you don't have a private vehicle with you to take you and your seddlings home.

September Goals

Today is the first day of September. I think today is the start of the Christmas season in the Philippines since it is also the start of the "BER" months (months ending in "ber") leading to Christmas. I already heard carols on TV and the radio.

I made a list of things to do for this month. Since Hubby returned, our days are filled with eating out, cooking, travelling, Facebooking (if there is such a term) and watching TV. Now is the time to be a little bit productive and make proper use of time.

Here are the things I want to accomplish this month:

1. clean my closet and remove clothes which I haven't used and will not use in the future

2. recycle the jars/bottles and use them as container for salt, garlic powder, paprika and other seasonings

3. plant the seedlings which we purchased over the weekend to our lot

4. update the layout of the collection of German and Russian recipes I searched on the Internet. This is for the Hubby, by the way.

5. try to cross-stitch at least 2 hours on weekdays. My cross-stitch project has been left undone for several months now.

Hopefully I can stick to these assignments so I can be proud of myself by the end of the month.

Victorinox Knife

In search for high-quality knives for Hubby, we found ourselves in Kitchen Pro. Kitchen Pro offers imported kitchen utensils, gadgets and cookware. A paradise for my Hubby, if I may say so.

He wanted a Victorinox chef knife and a paring knife. When he was eyeing a Victorinox, the saleslady offered a Henkels instead, saying it is more durable. But, Hubby insisted on a Victorinox since he had used a Henkels knife before and it was heavy because the handle also has steel in it.

We left the store with an 8-inch chef knife (P1,600), paring knife (P200) and a carving knife (P200).

I can tell Hubby is so happy with his knife investment. He doesn't even want me to borrow it!

Kitchen Pro

Shangri-la Mall
Shop Number 473, Level 4
632-9121

Condolences and Prayers

My condolences and prayers to the families of those who were killed yesterday at the 10-hour hostage drama in Manila.

Such a sad and tragic story.

Three-week wait

Our check-up with Dra. Tanangonan brought good news. Four days before, she told us that my follicle should be 2.0cm by the time of our next check-up. And now, the ultrasound shows that I have a mature egg measuring 2.5cm that would rupture anytme soon! Woohoo! My endometrium lining also increased to 1.3cm (before it was 0.8cm) because of Progynova.

She gave us the "Sched" and told us that we should strictly follow it. (*wink, wink*) If I don't get my period, I'll do a pregnancy test three weeks from now. If period comes, I have to go back to her anyday from Cycle Day 1-3.

So now, we will follow the "Sched". Hopefully we would be successful this time.

Jatujak

When our favorite Thai restaurant, Ooody's, relocated from the mall, Hubby and I looked for another Thai restaurant that would quench our cravings for those spicy, salty, sweet dishes. Then, we discovered Jatujak. Hubby's birthday is a great excuse to try this restaurant.



Jatujak (pronounced as cha-tu-chak) is named after a famous weekend market in Bangkok.

We scanned the menu and found their prices not too expensive for Thai food. There is no dish above P300. Yes!

The Tom Yum Goong (spicy-sour shrimp soup) (P195) tasted like sinigang but a much spicier version. I tasted a big punch from the ginger. Very nice to eat during cold nights. A medium serving has three prawns.

The Chicken Pad Thai (P175) is a default order. Whenever we eat Thai, we always order Pad Thai.

Bagoong Rice (P155) is a winner for me. I loved the salty+sweet taste of the rice and some pork chunks. Combine these with slivers of green mango and you'll have a party of flavors in your mouth.

We only ate one fresh springroll (P115) since we were already full. I liked that it is a vegetarian dish (I need to incorporate more veggies in my meals.) which we can make at home.
I had the Thai Iced Tea (P78), a house specialty. It tasted like milk tea. Two persons can share a glass of it. Since it's his birthday, Hubby ordered a beer. :) See how tall a glass of Thai Iced Tea is?

Jatujak
SM Megamall
UG/F, Bldg. A
637 -1772


SM Mall of Asia
Level 2, Unit 237
Entertainment Mall
556-0850

Hubby's Birthday

Happy Birthday to my loving and very understanding Hubby!

We will be attending an afternoon mass later and have dinner at a Thai resto called Jatujak. I look forward to spending quality time with Hubby. This is our first time to celebrate our birthdays together. Cheers to us!

Hoping for 2.0!

Cycle Day 12

Today is Follicle Monitoring day. This calls for a TVS (transvaginal sonogram) which costs P970. Dra. Tanangonan said I have two follicles/eggs about 1.0 and 1.1cm in size in my right ovary. Last week I had none. Yey! I needed at least one to mature.

She prescribed Progynova to be taken for three days. I have to return on CD 16 for another TVS. She told me that the follicles should be 2.0cm, the size of a mature egg, ready for fertilization. Everyday, an egg should increase 0.2cm in size. I thought if those two matured and fertilized at the same time, does that mean we'll have twins? <*wink*wink*> There is another option aside from the medicine, whichis injection. She wouldn't recommend it to me yet. We'll wait until CD16 if I needed to have the injection. Hope not.

I've read a PCOS diary that keeps me inspired lately. If I would base my situation on her timeline, I'm on her entry dated April 12, 2003, three weeks until she got pregnant. I hope Hubby and I would be blessed too, three weeks from now.

The Joy Luck Club

image here

Take a break from my PCOS worries.



The Joy Luck Club is a novel by Amy Tan which I read as a school requirement in college. I have this book but someone borrowed it and never returned. Most of my books end up that way. I have also watched the movie and only have vague memories of the story.

I spotted this book in Book Sale and immediately wanted to buy it. It's only P80! <*giddy dance*> As much as possible, I rarely buy new books. I check out second-hand shops and thrift book shops for my book collection. I'm happy when I find great books at lower prices.

1 Peter 5:6-7

The diagnosis of my OB GYNE caught us by surprise. I have regular menses and am not overweight. Learning that I have PCOS made me research about it. I found websites (fertility websites) and learned alot about this syndrome. What to call PCOS? A syndrome? A disease?

At first I was saddened by the thought of having problems with conception. I was not expecting I have a condition that makes it difficult for Hubby and I to have a baby.

Yesterday, as I was changing to my day clothes or pambahay, I said a short silent message to God. In my mind, I asked God to let me know what to do about this situation. I'm a worrier and I don't want to worry about things that I have no control over. Worry = stress. We don't need no stress at this time, right?

I told myself to do all the things needed to make myself healthy, taking my medicines, eating the right foods (junk food and sweets, goodbye!) and doing some exercise (tho I haven't started this yet). If we are not lucky this Cycle, I will not stress over it. There are things beyond my control.

I go about doing my evening rituals. I read the Daily Bread and the Bible. The passage for the day was 1 Peter 5-11. And here is God's immediate answer to my message:

"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."

I can't help but smile as I pored over the passage and read an article about it in the Daily Bread. God moves in mysterious ways indeed.

PCOS

According to Wikipedia,

PCOS or Polycystic ovarian syndrome is one of the most common female endocrine disorders affecting approximately 5%-10% of women of reproductive age (12–45 years old) and is thought to be one of the leading causes of female infertility.

I am diagnosed to have PCOS. In both ovaries.

When I had my period, Hubby and I went to my OB, Dra. T. She requested a transvaginal sonogram (TVS) for me so she could take a look at my uterus and ovaries. I was a bit scared at first because of the procedure but I said to myself I would do whatever it takes just to conceive a normal and healthy baby.

We found out that I have retroverted uterus (*sad face*) and I have PCOS (*double sad face*).

image from here

Dra. T gave me a prescription to take 2 tabs of Clomid (50g) before bedtime for five days. On Day 12 of my cycle, I have to see her and she will do follicle monitoring. Based on my research, it means checking if Clomid made my eggs mature. Hopefully it does.

A tablet of Clomid costs P244.75! Hubby and I were surprised when the pharmacist told us our total bill.

Waiting

For this year, I have 29 to 32-day cycles. It means I have my monthly period any day between the 29th and the 32nd day from the first day of my previous period. Since this is Cycle 2 and the cycle after our visit to the OB, Hubby and I are hopeful and positive. Hubby, very positive. Me, not so much. I still have some allowance for sad news. I don't like being disappointed.

Day 29
This is the first day when I'm supposed to have a period. It coincides with my birthday. Silently prays to God that He doesn't let my spirits down today.

Prayers answered. Thank You!

Day 30
Second day of waiting for something not to happen. Isn't it ironic? I'm still sick and I decided to take a leave and go to a ENT for check-up. Doc prescribes an antibiotic which he says is safe for those pregnant Yes, I told him I might be expecting even if I'm not yet sure.

Day 31
This anticipation is agonizing. Wish I could go now to Day 33, without having my period AND getting a positive from a pregnancy test. Everytime I take a pee, I'm searching for that unwanted stain.

Day 32
Today is a make or break day. This is the longest cycle I had for this year. Hopefully, I won't be disappointed. Still on the lookout for that unwanted stain. After each pee, I say a silent thanks to God. :)

As of press time, I feel that we are going to the positive side. Yoohoo!


__
08/05/10

Sadly, my period came. :(

My Birthday

Today is a happy day coz it's my birthday! Woohoo!

Hubby and I will attend mass later this afternoon and will have dinner at one of our favorite (albeit a bit on the expensive side) restaurants, Racks.

Hopefully, I will be given the gift which can't be bought. Hubby and I are praying (and hoping tremendously) for that.

Is Coming Up

image here

My birthday, that is.

Hubby asks what I want for my birthday. I want his gift to be a surprise but he insists on letting him know what I want so I won't be disappointed. We will be going to the mall and I would show him the things that I like to receive. Right now, I want an office bag (since I only have one) and the What to Expect when You're Expecting by Heidi Murkoff and Sharon Mazel. Although I'm hesitant about it. I feel we should be 100% sure that I'm positive.

Maybe I should ask for What to Expect Before You're Expecting, instead.

He's not gonna tell what he'll buy. Is that "surprise" enough for me? Yes, it is good enough.

Baguio Orchidarium

The gate is open.

The sign says it's an orchidarium.

I've never read about this in my research for Baguio tourist spots. We still had time to spare so we entered the gate and see what lies inside the orchidarium.

Inside is an area filled with plants in pots, a gazeebo (which looks unused) and...plants. There were a few men (gardeners?) who came by and left. We looked around, sat on a bench to smell the clean air. There's a path which I imagine would lead you to a secret cove...

We saw seedlings of a pine tree. I wished I could bring it home but I know that it would not thrive here.